When believers of those truths would attempt to convince me of the truthfulness within, I would become defensive. Remaining convinced that their truths were a crutch… they were duped into living their lives based on a storybook. I would convict those believers of such truths as weak fools.
For the first 30 years of my life I lived with this mentality about God’s truth and the Bible. Although I had a relationship with God, I could not define What or Who that was. I just knew I had a connection with something much bigger than I.
I began to ask God questions. Did the Bible have truth? Was there something to these “stories”? Was Jesus just a fictional character? As I asked more and more questions, my mind began to accept what my heart knew all along… the truth about these truths.
Questioning my old thought patterns and challenging what I thought was truth, was just what I needed to pull the plug on my guarded heart. That dirty water was too thick to see through to God’s light.
Once the plug was pulled concerning my old beliefs about Christianity, it was just like that of a bathtub plug being pulled. All of my old and dirty thoughts funneled down the drain. I didn’t want to contain them in the porcelain basin of my heart. I wanted to drain the old and ignorant lies out of my heart. I began to challenge all of my old patterns of thinking. If I could be so very wrong about Christianity, what other things could I be wrong about too? How could I replace my old thoughts and beliefs with those that mirror Jesus’ thoughts and beliefs?
A few years after the truth about God ricocheted between my heart and my mind, I accepted Christ Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I went from convictor to convicted. This began my journey of healing and becoming a new creation. There are too many blessings to properly count that arose from my acceptance of Jesus… eternal life in heaven being at that top of that too long list. One thing is for certain, the blessings are undeserved.
Pulling the plug on my guarded heart allowed God the space to fill it back up with His Love and the Truth that at one time was just a story to me. The porcelain basin of my heart is now full of clear, clean, and pure water that only comes from a relationship with God.